Protection orders are both effective and harmful. They can restore calm and create chaos. They are designed to put distance and time between you and your partner or family member who is abusing you or violent.
Time and Space are the only things that allow high levels of conflict and raging emotions to subside.
When you feel the time has come to seek more formal protection that you can provide for yourself or your children, a court order is a means of informing the person who is abusing you or violent that their behaviour will no longer be tolerated. I want to explain how to apply for an order and the components to include so your application gives you the outcome you are seeking.
There are two jurisdictions in which you can apply for protection. Civil and Family, and we will explain the difference.
If you need help with this please reach out.
- Applying for a protection order can be done in person by speaking with the registrar of the court. The local court will list the matter and issue a summons. You will be asked to provide the reasons why you need protection. It may be related to a particular incident, a series of events or chronic and persistent abuse, stalking or violence. Our Big Book of Abuse can help you identify what those behaviours are so you can both articulate and explain them.
- You may wish to provide some evidence, text, emails, taped phone calls, photos or previous reports to the Police. This can be daunting, overwhelming and emotional and having the right support when you are recalling these incidents to another person may be distressing. Self care and safety is the priority. You can collect this evidence on an app like Daisy. It’s important to describe what sort of person they are, their personality type, traits and how they behave in conflict. Be fair and honest. Showing that you acknowledge the good in a person also allows you to present yourself as reasonable, remembering that you may still love or like this person, but it’s their behaviour that is hurting you. Take photocopies of the evidence you are relying on to prove you have ‘future’ fears of
- Being Assaulted
- Stalked
- Harrassed
- Intimidated
- Threatened
- Otherwise interfered with
- Consider what orders you need or want to ensure you feel physically safe and then the orders that would help you feel psychologically safe. We know that random text messages, phone calls and emails also create distress and disrupt your day, so asking for a order that defines how you would like to communicate in particular about your children will help. We recommend parenting apps like Peaceful Parenting.
YOU APPLY FOR AN ORDER
- Once the application is made, an order may be issued after being assessed for risk of probability and possibility. There is a difference and it is usually based on previous incidents of a similar behaviour coupled with the type of threats that have been made and their personality traits during conflict.
- You’ll be given a date upon which the Application will be mentioned, where the other person known as the respondent or defendant will be summonsed to appear. The Police will serve the summons and you may be referred to the Police for further investigation if there is evidence of a criminal offence. You are under no obligation to make a report, statement or take part in an investigation at this time as it can be investigated at a later date when you are feeling safe.
- You will be representing yourself to the magistrate, and it’s just like having a normal conversation in which you state your position, your fears and why you feel you need the court to issue protection orders.
- It can be intimidating but also empowering. Asking for protection and support from a third party is both brave and strong. No one expects you to put up with abuse, violence, fear or living with threats to your personal and psychological safety.
On the other hand
POLICE TAKE OUT ORDERS
- If the Police attend an incident they are encouraged and obligated to take out a protection order to stop any further abuse or violence or modify the behaviour that puts you or your children at risk. It is an intervention for prevention of violence. They will make observations, ask for versions of the event from both party (at least they are suppose to) and then make a decision as to what action is appropriate. You may be asked to provide a statement and evidence such as images, text or emails would help the police in their investigation.
- You can also attend a police station on your own schedule and it’s best to speak with the DVLO. A liaison officer that is specialised in domestic and family violence. They are skilled at providing support and advice around how to stay safe, deal with unsafe situations and manage your day to day life until protection orders are obtained.
NOTE
It’s important to note here that many of the behaviours you report to the police when applying for an order are criminal offences. Making threats against you personally, your children, family or pets can constitute as intimidation. Blackmail and bargaining usually involve the use of personal information that would be exposed in exchange for something they want. Intimidation is that controlling behaviour that stops you doing what you would naturally do and Stalking is the monitoring and following you and your tech. It’s important to understand that Police may initiate an investigation based on the information you give them, they may or may not charge people with those offences.
AT COURT
- On the first occasion your application is heard, your partner may agree to the conditions of the order and make admissions regarding the behaviour. This is there undertaking and promise that this type of behaviour will stop.
- Or if they disagree, an interim order may be made on the first occasion, with the other person agreeing to the conditions without admissions. This means they will abide by the orders made but do not agree with the allegation. The matter is then listed for a hearing.
- There may be associated charges like assault, intimidation or stalking in which case these will appear concurrently in the criminal courts whilst a protection order is processed through the civil court.
- A breach of the protection order becomes a criminal offence which is then mentioned and heard in the criminal court.
NOTE
Protection orders do not solve your relationship issues. They do not stop your partner from lying to you, committing acts of betrayal nor do they process the resentment felt. Your issues can not be resolved by the Police. They are a strategy for intervention to provide y0u with the time and space to get the support and understanding of the relationship dynamics and the opportunity to find a solution
AT THE HEARING
Some defendants or respondents disagree with your allegations and will defend their reputations and try to justify their behaviour. They will do this by trying to prove you are crazy or abusive, that you caused the argument or you suffer from mental health. What I can tell you is that many magistrates, not all but some, can see through this type of defence.
- Magistrates know it takes a lot for people to share the intimate details of their relationship in an open court.
- Magistrates know that there is more to the story than is being disclosed.
- Magistrates know that you are the one person who knows that other person really well and that you love, loved or only want the abuse and violence to stop.
- A protection order is usually issued on the basis that there is a probability the behaviour will continue if the intervention order is not granted. It does not necessarily have to establish an offence has occurred. It looks at the risk of the behaviour to the person in need of protection and other circumstances like the impact it will have on children if it happens or isn’t stopped.
Protection orders are usually in place for 2-5 years with provisions that is ‘significant changes’ have occurred the conditions can be reviewed. In this time frame, you can attend counselling, apply to the Family Court for a divorce, parenting plans and financial settlement with confidence, knowing that where once you were scared to speak up and say what you were feeling or wanted will not be met with a barrage of abuse and threats.
FAMILY VIOLENCE PROTECTION ORDERS
A family violence order (including an interim order) is generally made under a prescribed law of a state or territory to protect a person from family violence.
If you have a family violence order, you must tell the Family Court about the order.
Family violence orders are called different things in different states, for example:
- Australian Capital Territory: Family Violence Order
- New South Wales: Apprehended Domestic Violence Order
- Northern Territory: Domestic Violence Orders
- Queensland: Protection Orders
- South Australia: Intervention Orders
- Tasmania: Family Violence Orders
- Victoria: Intervention Orders
- Western Australia: Violence Restraining Orders .
Although the names of family violence orders differ in each state and territory, the processes in each state are similar and family violence orders made in any state and territory can be registered for enforcement in any other state or territory if needed.
Individuals who are experiencing violence in a domestic or family relationship can apply for a family violence order. Depending on the state or territory the order is being applied in, the relationships can include:
- an intimate partner or intimate personal relationship
- a family relationship, or
- an informal care relationship.
CHILD PROTECTION ORDERS
The court can grant a child protection order only if it believes that the child needs protection from harm and does not have a parent who is willing and able to provide protection. The court must be sure the order is necessary to ensure the child’s safety.
Child protection is prescribed in child welfare law of a state or territory, where authorities (Government Agency including Department of Community and Justice) may intervene in family settings and make orders in relation to the care and protection of a child or young person due to an allegation of harm or significant risk of harm to a child.
Child protection orders are different to family violence orders. They are made by a state or territory Children’s Court when it is believed that a child is in need of protection. However, children can also be included on family violence orders made for a parent if appropriate.
CHANGING THE ORDERS
You can apply to make changes to the order if your situation changes.
It’s called an application to vary the protection order.
You can ask the court to consider changing any domestic violence order, even if a police officer made the original application to the court.
If the court decides to make the changes you are asking for, it will issue a varied order.
If the court does not agree to the changes you are asking for, the current domestic violence order will remain in place.
Changes to current orders can include:
- adding or removing conditions
- adding or removing named people (e.g. children, relatives, and associates)
- extending or reducing the time the order is in force.
The court must consider whether the requested changes will reduce your and/or a named person’s safety, protection or wellbeing (if you are the aggrieved or a named person). If you are the respondent they consider whether the requested changes will affect the aggrieved or a named person in this way.
In our work we help people find the strategies to develop a feeling of both physical and personal safety. Personal safety is by far the hardest to achieve as the trauma and fear stored in the body is replayed in the mind and felt in the heart every day. When living within a high conflict relationship where you are walking on egg shells, managing relationships and conversations, even avoiding topics and complying with demand just to stay safe – it’s time to talk to someone, not only to support and validate that feeling you have but to discuss a new way of living the life you want.
CONTROL ISSUES! We’ve all got them.
We know you know this person better than anyone else and we also know they are no ‘bad’ people all the time. The manipulation and intimidation that goes on in abusive relationships is both insidious and disguised, but we know your experience with them has taught you how to ‘behave’. Stepping outside these expectations may cause the chaos you actively avoid by compromising your dream, goals and ambitions.
TIME TO TAKE ACTION!
When considering a protection order for yourself or your children, there are many reasons and types of protection you can apply for from the local or family court.
The local court is a civil jurisdiction – if you personally apply, your application is taken on face value and the other person is summons to answer the allegations and either agree to abide by the conditional orders you are wanting. It’s important to consider why you need this level of protection.
For example, whether you live together or not, changing the behaviour of someone else is difficult and we know that you would have tried and discussed the impact of their actions without seeing changed bahaviour. There has most likely been incidents where conversations have become abusive and threatening. Where acts of aggression including yelling, name calling and f You feel intimidated by their physical presence
For example these orders are the strategy to prevent abuse and violence. It’s important to understand in what circumstances these types of behaviour occur. For example, contacting the person in need of protection when drunk is covered by Order number 3, approaching them at their work place or in the supermarket is covered by order number 4. In some cases, orders are tailored for specific circumstances including in the exchange of children.
These orders are designed to reduce the incidence and opportunity of abuse or violence and if breached, intention or reckless intent is a element of the proofs. A reasonable explanation is not an excuse.
TYPES OF CONDITIONS IN THE COURT ORDERS
- 1. The defendant must not do any of the following to <protected people>, or anyone <she/he/they> <has/have> a domestic relationship with:
A) assault or threaten <her/him/them>,
B) stalk, harass or intimidate <her/him/them>, and
C) deliberately or recklessly destroy or damage anything that belongs to <protected people>.
Additional orders can be sought depending on the circumstances, for example:
Restrictions put in place against the Defendant:
- No longer allowed to reside at the family home
- Not allowed to contact the protected person except through the use of a lawyer,
- Not allowed within a certain distance from the protected person/s residence, work or school.
- Not allowed to be in the company of protected person for at least 12 hours after taking alcohol or drugs.
- Not allowed to possess any firearms or prohibited weapons.
- Not allowed to try and locate the Protected Person.